bricolagelife

opening up

for almost a month i've been visiting a chiropractor twice a week for adjustments.  he is retraining my body to hold a proper alignment and along with a few specific exercises and the support of sleeping deeply thru the nights on my new mattress, my back feels at least 85% better already.  

the offices are located at a fairly gritty intersection in the city, but once i am inside looking out i find myself drawn to the beauty of the views and the light and reflections from every window.  it is calming.  

and while i wait, i shoot what i see there.

i admit i don't fully understand what he's doing all the time.  i just know it works (and any doctor who never asks you to get undressed or even take your shoes off is ok by me).  while i lay on the table yesterday, my mind spinning around a thousand thoughts and images built up inside, not fully paying attention, i told myself... open.  just be open.  it came to me suddenly and i relaxed and took in what was being given in that moment.  simply, healing.  if i wasn't open, i thought, how could i accept it? so i was.  and i did.

and as i was leaving the office one of the massage therapists approached me and asked if i would like a complimentary session...  talk about instant karma.  it seemed as if the universe was showering me with treats.  

i don't even remotely understand what this guy was doing (something sacro-cranial), but i was open to it.  and when the session was complete i felt like a whole new human being.  i am not even exaggerating.  i can't remember the last time i had such a powerful sense of total well-being.  

isn't it amazing how one small word can propel you so far forward so unexpectedly?  like magic.

i have a new motto

happy weekend!

full

Gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.                   

                                                        -GK Chesterton

it's been a big week of changes.  first i discovered that all i had to do was ask.  the chiropractor, that is.  i've been putting off the treatments for over a year because we couldn't afford it.  and then i called and asked if he would be willing to see me on a payment plan and he said yes.  after two adjustments i am already feeling the difference.

and then i got an even bigger surprise.  an early birthday gift of a new mattress from some of my near and dears.  i didn't see it coming and i can still hardly believe it's real.  the very much needed firm new bed is like a dream come true.  sleeping on it for the first time last night was better than a commercial for sleeping on a beautiful new firm mattress.  like a miracle, really.

it seems loony now, but after sixteen months of chronic pain i really did believe it was just something i had to learn to live with, accept, adapt to.  icing my back twice a day and swallowing ibuprofen were simply becoming routine to me.  knowing i can and will feel well again is, well, wondrous!

sometimes people are so kind and generous to me i falter for adequate words to thank them properly. but i want them to know i am truly, deeply grateful.

thank you.

clicking around on sunday morning

i spilled the coffee this morning.  which is leading me to seriously reconsider... everything.  while i was on my hands and knees cleaning up i turned to see the dusty spattery spots and messes in the corners and low down just out of everyday sight that one finds when one is on their hands and knees in the kitchen.  i thought again of a constant daydream of mine.  a dream of a seamless home.  a place designed without all of the dead space between walls and fixtures, without many surfaces where dust can build up or hide away.  a place with hidden closed storage everywhere.  a serene place so seamless you could hose it down in ten minutes and be finished cleaning... aaaaaah.

but of course i don't live that way.  i like details and pleasing objects arranged in pretty groupings.  i like baseboards and crown mouldings and old wood floors and paneled doors.  i like curtains on the windows and shears underneath.  i like art on the walls and i like books and bookcases.  i collect things.  i have a lot of dusty corners.  and my dream home looks more like this.

after visiting my dream home i found a personality quiz at smosch i had to take.  i like quizzes.  but they always ask a lot of either-or questions that i want to click both answers to.  both answers are sometimes truer than one.  but still, you might like to take it too.  see my results here.

besides spending time spilling things on the kitchen floor and clicking around the internet, i have been getting things done around here.  

this is almost finished.  i led all those threads thru the eye of a needle and back thru the fabric where i tied each one off in knots underneath.  and then i made a lot of layered prints.  see them here.

what are you finding while you click around these days?  send me links with your comments!  i love links.  and comments :)

happy sunday!

evening light

from my window.  starting a new sewing project today... and a new brooch for a trade i'm happily anticipating.  it's good to have projects :)

this is good stuff.  i'm probably the last person to hear about it.  but glad i did.  it's worth every minute.

and i'm hearing this is wonderful.  i'm sensing a connection...

happy monday :: farewell june!

bad bad typepad

typepad and i aren't speaking right now.  i don't like to fight, but typepad upgraded their compose page last night and i really really really strongly dislike it.  am i the only one?  

oh, typepad, you didn't even discuss it with me first.  and you know how important clear communication is to me.  i posted a comment about it on your home page, but you didn't even publish it, let alone respond... you send me form letter responses.  they're so impersonal.  and you link me to a long list of tutorials i don't have time to read.  i have lost some of my favorite settings and you know i am not too tech savvy so now i have to relearn the whole system.  and i really really strongly dislike that. how could you do it to me, when i trusted you?  when you know how long it took me the first time to get my photo defaults just right?  

here's your pillow and blanket.  you can sleep on the couch tonight.

 

happy mother's day

winding our way slowly home along the two-lanes from my uncle's house the summer my son was a baby, we stopped to spend the night in a tidy little roadside motel. flowers were blooming in every patch of earth to be seen around the grounds and the elderly couple who owned the place came out to our car to greet us. my son, a sweaty sweet bundle, slept as i lifted him from his warm car seat and pressed his head against the hollow of my neck.

as i turned to the kind woman who was showing us to a room, she reached out and caressed my son's little fist with her crooked finger. she asked the usual friendly questions about his age and name and where we were from as she walked us to the door. as i waited for my husband to get our few bags inside, she looked at me and said;

"you can never love your mother as much as she loved you. and you never know how much your mother loved you until you have a child of your own."

then she walked away, leaving me standing there with my mouth hanging open. i wasn't sure if i wanted to laugh or cry, but i have never forgotten that tender encounter with a stranger. i recall it especially on this day.

i wish you all happy mother's day!

new work, economy, and the bricolage way

i've been working lately with my photographs and printer, making new and layered prints. today i got some framing done... in the bricolage way. i printed the tulips photo on an old piece of watercolor paper and the layered prints on strathmore textured stationery samples from my stash. both papers were hand-me-downs, donated by someone who had no use for them anymore. i prefer the way my photos look on the unorthodox matte papers rather than the glossies i get from the kodak plant. but i'm never sure if they will last as long as professional photo prints. the black frame is from ikea and the others were rescued from the trash. two of these prints are gifts. i guess one man's trash is another's gifts and art projects :)

thoughts of how these things are interconnected have been rolling around in my head these days. being greatly experienced in frugality and economy (but not loving it all the time), i have done things in a bricolage way for most of my life. the day i discovered the definition of the word {something constructed by using whatever materials happen to be available} it seemed as if a hundred light bulbs flipped on above my head, not just one. an inspired moment of recognition set me on a new path and gave me a sense of validation. it has become second nature to me; when i don't have the resources to go out and buy the perfect tools and supplies, i must stretch my creative muscles to come up with unique solutions and substitutions. some of my most important and beloved equipment has come to me as gifts from generous friends and family (for which i am grateful on a daily basis).

i have grown to embrace the challenge of my financial limitations over the years (but not love them all the time) and realize that i apply bricolage ways to almost everything i do in life. some my favorite recipes for cooking involve the meals i manufacture out of the last four ingredients left in the pantry. some of the best displays i have built consisted of lovely merchandise mixed with props found in the basement and alley. my home is a rented space, decorated in a mix of new, old, handmade and hand-me-down furnishings. and some of my favorite art projects are initiated by the desire to make something new out of scraps usually discarded.

over the past year i have happily discovered that this way of working, of living, is much more universal than i originally imagined. that's been the icing on my cake :) and i've been asked often about the title bricolagelife and what it means... but this is probably way more definition than anyone expected, so thanks for reading as i ramble on. my brain runneth over...

more ilford film love

beware. stumbling upon a cache of your own old photos is a like falling into a deep hole. a hole where time does not exist. nor laundry, to do lists, dinner... as soon as i lifted the lid on the box marked simply; photos, i was a goner. lost. sifting thru the past. there is a dreamy spooky quality in the grainy richness of the ilford film shots that i still love so much. i am not a professional, not technically proficient. never was. my little rollei 35 mm camera doesn't even allow me to focus thru the lens. but the ilford forgives. it doesn't judge. it's nice that way.

the more i looked, the more i stacked and sorted. and then the scanning started. late in the day my ever-patient spouse poked his head in the door and asked, "what are you doing? taking a trip down memory lane?"

oh, yes. here is some of what i found...

as it was then, my eye is still drawn to windows,

and what i see out of the windows,

and to the light and shadows and corners of my home,

and to recording the everyday moments all around me.

and no one is cuter than my sweetie.

spring is brown

and grey

and a little bit pink

and a little bit green

and very blue.

i know it's silly but i always feel like i am witnessing a miracle when i see the sun and the moon up in the sky at the same time. it feels rare and exciting and i will always point it out to someone as if i have discovered a new planet. and then take its picture.

we also "discovered" this huge old tree growing in the corner of a grade school playground. twelve to fifteen feet up from it's roots it is covered with the lumpy scars of children's carvings, some enclosed in hearts, now indecipherable. how long ago did young students lean against the sturdy grey trunk of the tree and cut with elbows raised into the soft flesh of its bark? do children still do this?